Monday, April 7, 2014

The First Batch of Book Publishing Tips for New Authors

Are you a new author looking for advice about how to self-publish your book? Or have you published a book and are looking for ways to improve the process? I’ve self-published two books, sold a good number of both and am now working on my third. I’ve experienced a lot along the way and want to share the lessons I’ve learned, including the good, the bad and the downright ugly. I also plan to share experiences and suggestions from other writers, and even a book store owner or two, whom I’ve met along the way.
Here is the first batch of tips:

Thursday, March 13, 2014

Richard Rios "Songs of The Barrio" - Reading his story 'A Rite of Passage.'

Richard is a friend of mine, my favorite Californa writer. And this is my favorite story from "Songs of the Barrio."

Saturday, February 22, 2014


This is Clifton Batchelor. I call hm Clif the Lawyer. This is because he is a certified plumber. Okay, he's not a plumber. He's a lawyer - and web designer, and a writer, and a audio/video engineer, and a photographer, and an editor, and a graphic designer, and a publisher, and a musicial and an all around idea man. I'm telling you, this guy does everything but sell popcorn. 

To the subject at hand, take a look at the website Clif created for me.

Clif was instrumental in publishing my first book, The Eight-Fingered Criminal's Son. He edited the book, created the cover design, took the author photograph, and created Cactus Surf Press. Most importantly, he convinced me to publish the collection of stories. In case you haven't figured it out, I'm a big Clif the Lawyer fan. Here's his website. 

The Eight-Fingered Criminal's Son and The Spirit Guide Bar are available at

Papa Joe's Barbershop - Chandler, Arizona 
Chandler Auto and Tire - Chandler, Arizona
Zia Records - eight locations in Arizona and Nevada
The Book Frog - Rolling Hills, California 
Barns and Nobel. com 

TEECHUR: Confessions of a Reluctant Educator, my third book, is on track for release this summer.

People who get sick when they go through tunnels while riding in carpools have carpool tunnel syndrom.

Saturday, November 9, 2013


Contrary to popular belief, the job can of a get pretty rough. The gruesome photo to the left clearly demonstrates my point. I had no idea things would get so ugly when I loaded up my truck and headed off to the bug wars that day. I had no intention of walking into an orange tree, but as you can clearly see, it happened, baby. Sure walking into orange trees is dangerous, but  danger is part of the job.

The job gets physical too. I've pulled muscles on various parts on my being. It's not something I tell my colleagues since most of them are in their 70s and 80s. Danger, pain and, humiliation, it's all part of the job, baby.

I am a bugman. It's what I do.

Actually, I'm a bugman/writer. Cheri Holdcroft was kind enough to invite me to read and speak to her English 102 class at Mesa Community College this week. What a rush. We talked about writing for almost two hours. Great bunch of students. They made up for my knock on the mellon.


You can buy my book at the following venues:

PAPA JOE'S BARBER SHOP in Chandler, Arizona

CHANDLER AUTO AND TIRE in Chandler, Arizona

ZIA RECORDS throughout California, Arizona and Nevada

THE BOOK FROG in Chandler, Arizona

I'll be signing books at THE BOOK FROG in Rolling Hills, California Saturday, November 30th between 2:00 and 4:00.

My books are available at the site below. Imagine, you can download both books for the price of a measly six pack of beer.

Saturday, November 2, 2013


"The Scout" is a masterfully written science fiction thriller. The characters are complete and believable. Descriptions of rural Indiana are vivid, almost poetic. Author, Eric Tozzi, weaves a balanced story about a young writer's struggle to deal with the loss of his father, his mother's Alzheimer's disease, and an alien invasion. Tozzi does a fantastic job explaining the science of this alien invasion story. Michael Crichton is my favorite contemporary sic fi writer because of his ability to include compelling science with in his great stories. "The Scout" has a Crichton feel to it. I under stand that Eric Tozzi is a bit of modern day renaissance man. He's an accomplished musician, editor, director and screenwriter. His most recent film is "Kaleidoscope," an award winning short movie based on a story in Ray Bradbury's "Illustrated Man." Bradbury worked with Eric on the project. I think some of Bradbury's sci fi mojo rubbed off on Tozzi.Can't wait to see the film version.To the point, Eric Tozzi's "The Scout" kicks ass.

As Tozzi tells his twitter followers, you can download the ebook for the cost of a latte.

Saturday, October 26, 2013


Papa Joe, Joe Junior, and the boys at  Papa Joe's Barbershop in Chandler, Arizona were kind enough to host a book and a haircut event. The first 20 customers received  one of my books with their haircuts.

Five of my former students absolutely made my day by swinging by to partake in the festivities. So did my one of my all time favorite former colleagues Terri Glenn.

Two  the guys are studying to become teachers. Got to tell you, fellas like the one's pictured above and a colleague like Terri remind me why I lasted a quarter century in the education biz.

Yours truly with the most famous barber in Chandler, Arizona.

Here's a shot of Papa Joe telling one of his world famous penguin jokes. I'll bet you didn't know that nationally famous comedian Frank Calliendo gets his hair cut at Papa Joe's. The haircuts are top notch but I think it's the penguin jokes that keep him coming back.

I did a reading of "Dave Cruz" in the barbershop. The most exciting part was when an older guy wandered in half way through the story. He looked around, completely baffled, he shouted, "Hold on! What's goin' on? Can I get a haircut around here or what?

I think I really dig barbershop readings. A guy just never knows. You got to expect the unexpected.

You  can order THE SPIRIT GUIDE BAR and THE EIGHT-FINGERED CRIMINAL'S SON at THE BOOK FROG (My all time favorite book store)

My books are also available at PAPA JOE'S BARBERSHOP in Chandler, Arizona, where you can get a great haircut, Papa Joe will tell you a penguin joke and you might even see famous funny guy Frank Calliendo.

I'm busting my tail editing and revising my new book TEECHUR: CONFESSIONS OF A RELUCTANT EDUCATOR, due for in 2014.

So Cal folks, come on out to THE BOOK FROG IN ROLLING HILLS on Saturday, November 30th at 2:00. I'll be signing books and participating on a panel with Tim Hallinan, Steven Jay Schwartz, and Denise Hamilton.

For my Arizona friends, I'm working on a couple of East Valley readings in December.

Sunday, September 29, 2013

Book Talk with William Snyder #4

I'll make you a deal. Buy one of my books if the viking bit makes you laugh.

Taking the glass is half full road, I'll point out that you can order The Eight-Fingered Criminal's Son or The Spirit Guide Bar by clicking on this link:

Sunday, August 11, 2013

One Minute Book Talk #3

Here is the link to the  third installment of One Minute Book Talk.

Click here: One Minute Book Talk #3

While I offer no excuse for the content, the technology is markedly better than the first episode. This is because I am now working with a Mac. The first episode was created with a brand new HP computer. Within one week the thing picked up a virus. I took the HP to the Geek Squad at Best Buy. They had the thing for a week and couldn't figure out how to install high end virus protection. Got my money back and bought a Mac.

My first week as a writer bug man was enjoyable. I have no second thoughts about leaving my teaching gig. No more waking up in the middle of the night. Nice colleagues and customers. Real smooth. I did walk into a cactus while I was spraying a yard.

Bug Fact: An ant can survive up to two weeks underwater.

You can order The Eight-Fingered Criminal's Son and The Spirit Guide Bar by clicking on the link below.

Saturday, July 27, 2013


I'm still anxiously waiting to start my post teaching bug man career. The bug wars begin August 5th and I've been plugging away at the insect manuals every day. Here's a neat little factoid: scientists believe ancient scorpions were eight feet long. I know. I really need to start back to work. August 5th seems like a long way off, especially to my wife and kids. I've been peppering them all with bug trivia for weeks now. They tell me I'm driving them nuts. They're such kidders.

I've settled into a productive writing routine. Most of the stories for TEECHUR: CONFESSIONS OF A RELUCTANT EDUCATOR are finished.  Test readers have told me that my teacher stories might be a little dark. That has something to do with the fact that the state of education in America is a lot dark. Still, I don't want to drive my readers to utter despair.  I've been trying to come up with glass is half full stories. Last week I was able to write 1,500 to 2,000 words a day. The hardest part has been the concept of writing optimistically about my most recent position, especially the last year. The last year was in many ways the most difficult of my 25 year career. It looks like my thoughts about my recent teaching experiences are going to need some time to simmer.

I'm considering releasing TEECHUR in four parts, as affordable Ebooks and then the releasing a complete bound version. I understand Indy writers are finding some success at this kind of thing.

If you're new to this site, I've published two books. The first is THE EIGHT-FINGERED CRIMINAL'S SON, a mostly true collection of stories about growing up in 1970s Southern California. The second is THE SPIRIT GUIDE BAR, a mostly true account of a bona fide transcendental journey.

The best place to buy these books is at THE BOOK FROG in Rolling Hills, California. If you live 500 miles from Rolling Hills you can by the Ebooks or bound versions at the link below.

Monday, July 22, 2013


A local bug control outfit has agreed to bring me on board to do battle with cockroaches, fire ants, bees, and scorpions. The boss even said he will let me wear the bee suit. I always wanted to wear a bee suit.

MUSINGS OF A BUG MAN WRITER. Sounds like a book to me.

I've been reading up on bugs and I've been picking up some interesting tidbits.
Bees and domesticated dogs kill more American's than all others combined. Bees killed 55 while Fidos and Rovers killed 33. And you are most likely to be bitten by a black widow while sitting in an outhouse.  Fascinating, huh?

My kids headed off for their first day of school today. This is the first first day of school that I did not stand in front of a classroom filled with teenagers in a very long time.  This is a good thing.

My bug man gig doesn't start for a couple of weeks. In the mean time I will work  on my new book, TEECHUR: CONFESSIONS OF A RELUCTANT EDUCATOR.

THE SPIRIT GUIDE BAR and THE EIGHT-FINGERED CRIMINAL'S SON are available at THE BOOK FROG in Rolling Hills, California.

You can order eBooks or bound versions by clicking on this link

Sunday, July 14, 2013


Joel Fricke took his family to Durango, Colorado this summer. He also took along some reading material. Colorado makes a gorgeous backdrop for my books, doesn't it?

Here's a shot of Joel.  He's an Iowa guy and like so may Iowa guys, he's pretty modest.

I'm still transitioning from classroom teaching into my next career or, as Ray Bradbury put it, building my parachute after jumping from the cliff. At this point, the one thing I am sure of is I had to leave my job as a high school teacher.
My next book will be a collection of stories, mostly about my 25 year teaching career. The working title is TEECHUR: Confessions of a Reluctant Educator.
 Why call myself a "reluctant educator?" My teaching career was supposed to be temporary - just one year, until I got my stand up comedy career going. 

Joel calls the above photo: "THE SPIRIT GUIDE BEAR."

Why misspell "Teacher?" I don't know.

The book is a collection of stories like The Eight-Fingered Criminal's Son.

TEECHUR isn't quite ready for editing. I need to do some stories based on my last seven years at an affluent high school in Chandler, Arizona. It's going to take some time to do some reflecting on the last seven years of my one year teaching career.  

Below a great shot of The Eight-Fingered Criminal's Son at the Durango State Beach.

Just checking to see if you're paying attention.

Well, it's back to making my Ray Bradbury parachute. Today, my parachute involves reading the Arizona Pest Certification Manual. 

Here's some interesting Arizona insect trivia. The Arizona Bark Scorpion can be trained to respond to commands like sit, roll over and yes, bark. That's why they are called Bark Scorpions. Okay, I completely made that up. Still checking to see if anyone actually reads these things.

You can buy a copy of THE SPIRIT GUIDE BAR by clicking on the link below.

Monday, July 8, 2013


I've been a former teacher for five weeks now. Hopefully, I will begin my new career as a bug man/writer within the  next week or so. Last week I applied for a job writing humorous educational study guides. I was asked to write a cover letter that would cause the reader to LMAO in the first paragraph. If the reader did not "LMAO by the end of the first paragraph, I was assured the cover letter and resume would be shredded.
Here is what I sent them.
When I was twelve I accidentally threw a dart into the side of the head of a kid by the name of Cary Blazjowski. He ran home with the dart wagging up and down from the side of his head and I followed, hoping to convince him not to tell on me. He told. His sister, Astrid Blazjowski, gave me the beating of my life with a yellow Con-air hair dryer while Cary watched, the dart still hanging there on the side of his head. But it wasn't as bad as you might think. Astrid Blazejowski was sixteen, and she was hot, and she was wearing a purple bikini. Astrid might have killed me if Richard Milhouse Nixon hadn't been on hand to pull her off of me and administer some basic medical attention. Okay, the President Nixon part didn't happen, I was just trying to make this whole thing sound a little more academic.
I spent twenty-five years as a teacher. That makes me – old. Sure I'm old, but I know stuff, man. I know that many Emily Dickinson poems can be sung to the tune of Gilligan's Island. And I know the opposite of Thoreau is Ca-atch. I know that John Hansen, not George Washington, was the first president of the United States – under the Articles of Confederation. A lot of history teachers are aware of John Hanson and the Articles of Confederation, but very few of them know that the Hanson Brothers of MMMBop fame are direct descendants of the first president. Okay, no they aren't, but it would it would be pretty funny if they were. I relate to the youth of America because I was be the best rapper in my old neighborhood. It's true. The parents in my hood always asked me to wrap their Christmas gifts because I could do tight bows and I used the sickest wrapping paper. Man, I could wrap.
Finally, I spent a few years researching, writing, creating and hosting humorous educational television programming. As a matter of fact, I once did a live broadcast as Abraham Lincoln and I wasn't wearing any pants. If your still reading, I assume you no longer have an ass and look forward to discussing my quirky qualifications and can be reached at or 480-867-5309.
Thank you,
Bill Snyder
I must assume that the folks at the educational study guide company do indeed still have their asses as I have not heard back.  I guess you can't make 'em all LMAO.
You can order copies of my books "THE EIGHT-FINGERED CRIMINAL'S SON" and "THE SPIRIT GUIDE BAR" by clicking on the link below.
Thanks to my former student Mike I. for the kind words about "THE SPIRIT GUIDE BAR." You made my day, Mike!
Finally, the four major cockroach species found in North America are the German cockroach, the Oriental cockroach, the American cockroach, and the brown-banded cockroach - also known as the person at the humorous educational study guide company who didn't LMAO when he read my cover letter cockroach.