Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Four of a Kind


I’ve been tagged by fellow blogger, Bullshee of India.

http://monkinhotwater.blogspot.com/

Here are Bulshee’s instructions.

"The basic idea, which does not need you to derive Heisenberg's Principle of Uncertainty is to fill in headings (sets of four), with your own words...don't use mine again. I'll kick your ruddy ass if you do."


FOUR BAD JOKES

1. Why won’t cannibals eat clowns?
They taste funny.


2. Why did the genie go to school?
He wanted to become a genie-us.

3. My brother fell into an upholstery machine.
Don’t worry, he’s fully recovered.

4. What happened to the thief when he fell into a cement mixer?
He became a hardened criminal.

FOUR VERY COOL BIG SCREEN PERSONALITIES






1. Steve McQueen.
The original king of cool.



2. Bruce Lee
He’s Bruce Lee for Crying out loud.



3. Denzel Washington
Smooth.




4. John Wayne
The Duke makes my list for spanking Maureen O’Hara.


FOUR BOOKS NOT TO READ



1. The Time Traveler’s Wife by Audrey Niffenegger
This book was so bad I stopped reading the thing. And I paid $14.95 for the piece of junk. I don’t understand how this author made something as intriguing as time travel so monotonous.



2. The Cell by Stephen King.

Say it ain’t so Stevie. How could such a great writer who wrote a rotten book. Actually he’s written a few stinkers over the years, but The Cell just might be his worst. The premise is kind of cool, maybe even funny. Everyone in America turns into a zombie except the people who don’t own a cell phone. Good premise or not, It’s a mess



3. The Historian by Elizabeth Kostova.
I want my time back. How do you write a dry vampire story? Make it a story about librarian vampires, which is what Kostova did. Horrible!



4. Hawkes Harbor by S.E. Hinton
Another bad vampire book. S.E. Hinton wrote some great books. The Outsiders was a masterpiece. Hawkes Harbor is the first book Hinton wrote in something like 25 years. I guess she lost something in the lay off. Perhaps she should stick to writing about teenaged kids instead of grown up vampires.
FOUR FUNNY MOVIES



1. What’s Up Doc?
Funniest movie I’ve ever seen. Strangely enough, the movie starred Barbara Streisand and Ryan O’Neil, neither of whom where comedians. Furthermore it was directed by Peter Bogdanovich, a guy who wasn’t known for making comedies. The film includes the greatest comedic car chase ever shot.


2. Be Kind, Rewind
I saw this movie with my wife about a year ago. She did not seem to appreciate the humor. I’m pretty sure most people did not appreciate the humor since I was the only person in the theater who was laughing uncontrollably for the duration of the film.



3. Animal House
There’s never been anything like it. John Belushi was in his prime. Director John Landis nailed the elitist nature of college fraternities.



4. Slap Shot
This has got to be the funniest sports movie ever produced. Paul Newman is hilarious but it’s the Hanson brothers that steal the show. Whether you like hockey or not, it's funny stuff.
I’ve tagged the following superbloggers.

1. Bluesfrau of Germany

2. Guely of Sweden

3. BeFrank of L.A.

4. David C. of Indiana